And by sister wife, I mean my sister, who is also a wife.
For many, many months now, I have known that having a sister wife would be a wonderful thing. Yes, it did begin with seeing the ladies on cable doing it all so gracefully, but Amy and I have worked up a different plan. One that does not involve sleeping with one another’s husbands. (I can hear Rob sighing a deep sigh of relief!)
At first I thought one large house connected at the kitchen would be best. After all, it’s always at dinnertime that I feel most attracted to the sister wife concept. Whenever Amy or our “daughter” babysitter Sara are over around mealtimes, everything runs so smoothly. The children are entertained. The chopping gets done. The dishes are washed while the dinner is actually being prepared, making after dinner cleanup a breeze. The meals are more elaborate and all of the people are happier.
But Amy insists that she needs her own kitchen. I think about it for a moment, then say, “Agreed.” Okay, our own houses, but either attached at one wall with a lockable door leading between them, like hotel rooms, or two separate houses sharing a huge backyard. The hotel-like door is so that child protective services doesn’t take my children away when I want to leave the kids home while Greg and I go for a date night. Give the baby monitor to Amy and head on out. Of course, she and Rob could do the same. Win win.
And we’ve decided that our sister wife life needs to be before cell phones. Neither of us are fans of being instantly accessible. At first I said, before t.v., too. Which I still kind of stick to. But not before computers. We would need a computer to show movies to the kids when they’re sick or we need a break. Not that we’d need as many breaks with our sister wife to help us with child-rearing.
So…no cell phones, yes computers. But not internet. Well, except at the library. At home, if we want to know something we’ll pull out an encyclopedia or actually pick up the phone to interact with a human we love to find out an answer to our burning question. I think the internet has removed so many moments of connection between real life people. But it sure is neat. So we decided that it would be available at the library if we needed it.
Amy says she needs her space. Could that be a result of the person she’s talking to? Could I be a little overbearing? No…
And then Amy starts getting worried about where our sister wife house will be. Rob needs to be close to Coronado for his work. I suggest Texas because land will be cheap. She mentions the heat. I say that if we’re talking about a dream world, we shouldn’t be concerned about such trivial things. We’ll have Orange County weather on our Texas plantation. Now that I think about it, it had better be near the beach, too.
We will plan and cook most of our meals together, but since Amy “needs her space,” we will then carry them to our own house to eat with our own families, because we have a nagging suspicion that neither of our husbands will like our sister wife idea.
Today Amy keeps Midge and Kate occupied while the boys and I do our afternoon chores. I hold baby Kate as Amy packs up the stroller in her trunk to head home. We had a delicious chicken salad for lunch that I didn’t feel like making, but she did. The day is smoother than one would ever dream possible with four kids running around. See how perfect this sister wife thing is?